Read The New Rules of Marriage By Terrence Real

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The New Rules of Marriage-Terrence Real

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In his extraordinary new book, Terrence Real, distinguished therapist and bestselling author, presents a long overdue message that women need to hear: You aren’t crazy–you’re right! Women have changed in the last twenty-five years–they have become powerful, independent, self-confident, and happy. Yet many men remain irresponsible and emotionally detached. They don’t know how to respond to frustrated partners who just want their mates to show up and grow up.Enter the good news: In this revolutionary book, Real shows women how to master the new rules of twenty-first-century marriage by offering them a set of effective tools with which they can create the truly intimate relationship that they desire and deserve. He identifies five non-starters to avoid and shares practical strategies for bringing honesty, passion, and joy back to even the most difficult relationship. Using his experience helping thousands of couples shift from despair to profound emotional closeness, Real guides you through the process of relationship repair with exercises that you can do alone or with your partner. With this program you’ll discover how to - identify and articulate your wants and needs - listen well and respond generously - set limits, and stand up for yourself - embrace and appreciate what you have - know when to seek outside helpThe New Rules of Marriage will introduce you to a radically new kind of relationship, one based on the idea that every woman has the power to transform her marriage, while men, given the right support, have it in them to rise to the occasion.We have never wanted so much from our relationships as we do today. More than any other generation, we yearn for our mates to be lifelong friends and lovers. The New Rules of Marriage shows us how to fulfill this courageous and uncompromising new vision.

Book The New Rules of Marriage Review :



As a general book-junkie and frequent reader of topics on health, psychology, fitness, relationships, business, philosophy, cognitive science, and occasionally even a good old novel....I can say without the slightest hesitation that this book is a gigantic stand out from the regular sludge of self-help / advice lit out there. The book really does a terrific job of fulfilling its own promises to the reader. There is useful takeaway here. I’m very surprised at how much. Terry expertly balances some theory (more accurately I should say thought-models) with practice, anticipates and addresses the likely challenges and objections, provides genuinely interesting and realistic vignettes for each sub section, and left me feeling as though I had truly learned something utterly new: how is it that we can affect the course of our love-relationships unilaterally, how you can initiate a change by understanding how you are perpetuating the problems that plague your relationship. He does not preach, he even ends the book with a realistic assessment of when its time to split, but you’ll actually know if you’ve really done all that is humanly possible or not. The pain of doubt as to whose to blame for what, whether to endure or depart, how to diffuse conflict, etc etc etc...all so very well described. By the way, I’ll probably offend someone in saying this last point but I don’t care, it needs being said; most relationship salvaging books are written in a feminine mode, usually by woman or by men who seem to me very much lacking in masculinity....not so here. Guys, this one’s for us. The writing is assertive, incisive, yes - emotionally open, but in a good way that never alienated me (I’m a 56 year old Jersey dude who loves rock and roll and all that goes with it) and still I say this.Hope you liked my review.Thanks to APC for referring this book to me.Thanks Terry. Write another one soon.
Get it. Read it. Apply it WHETHER OR NOT YOUR SPOUSE DOES. Ideally, read it together. And, ladies, remember, sometimes the one who needs to "grow up and show up" is NOT the man...Most important takeaway: YOU are doing things you do not even realize you are doing that are hurting your relationship. Doesn't matter if your spouse really is or is not the bigger problem. Your issues MULTIPLY theirs. Get yourself straight. Read this as if it was ONLY about you. DO NOT use it to make your spouse wrong, use it to FIND and FIX your s***. You would be amazed at how much better things can be if you just get clear what you're contributing to the problem and really change. Good luck!(Obviously this advice does not apply in the case of serious abuse, real personality disorders and similar, significant problems. If you suspect significant problems, get yourself to a competent therapist (don't hesitate to fire incompetent ones!) and with that therapist, work on yourself and a plan of how to proceed. Most of the time you will be diagnosing your spouse with a "serious problem" where none exists, as a form of self protection, but getting to a good therapist (FOR YOURSELF, not to fix your spouse) is a really good move anyway)

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